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Parenting & Disciplining Your Children

By Gina D.h.

Times have really changed from when I came up. I can't believe that I'm saying this, but "back in the day" we were to be seen and not heard. We were taught to respect our elders. We would have never even thought of raising our voices to our parents let alone raising our hands to them.

If we acted up, there was that "LOOK" that Mom would give us. If that didn't work, there was the second warning which was usually the verbal warning. If we were dumb enough to ignore warning number two we were then on our own. We were either going to get a pinch to the arm, have our ear pulled or worse yet the biggest attention getter of all "The Butt Whipping". "OMG"

Thank God that didnt happen to often...Daddy never whipped us. He was at work when we seemed to act up.

Most of the whipping's were delivered by Mom. My dear Mom was a short woman with a heavy hand. Of course she would aim for the butt, but it usually landed everywhere else but the butt because of course we wouldn't stand still. We then became moving targets who were trying to get out of direct range of the belt.

Back in the 50's and 60's it was called "Discipline". Nowadays they call it "Child Abuse". Now Im sure Im not the only one who had strict but fair parents back in the day. Heck most of our parents would probably be serving some jail time in these modern times of rearing their children.

My three brothers and I have all turned out well. No damage done to us due to being disciplined. We all hold or have held demanding careers as adults.

My children who also received discipline in their upbringing were never problem children. They never dealt with drugs, or had any problems with the law. Im proud to say that my girls have all turned out to be beautiful responsible adults.

As a parent, it is our responsibility to set the example for our children. We have to teach our children at an early age that there are repercussions to deal with if they misbehave. They need our guidance to mold them into responsible young adults. Children don't need us as their friends. They need someone to look up to. That would be us "their parents".

I wouldn't change a thing from my upbringing. Not even the few whippings that I did get. I truly believe they made me a better woman. I know Mom & Dad are now both resting in peace knowing my brothers and I turned out alright.

Good job Mom & Dad. We love you......

Yes, your article is a significant contribution to a modern debate that will run and run. My own view is that it comes down to responsibility and integrity. I do not doubt that your parents, as you have described them, would have been able to instil a sense of morality and right living into you, even if they lived in our own generation, and were thus prevented from using "discipline" in the old-fashioned sense.

I believe this is because they were people with integrity and a strong foundation of moral rectitude, and it is this, I feel, that is the thing that is missing in our generation. Not the legal right to use corporal punishment, but the moral authority that was its exculpation.

Thank you for your comment Mr Paterson. I am in total agreement with you. I have always had the utmost love and respect for my parents. They taught my brothers and I the importance of having morals, integrity and always being responsible for our actions. I wouldnt have it any other way. I took pride in teaching the same to my own children. Again, thank you and have a fantastic evening...God Bless you & yours. Gina D.H.

It was called disipline in the 1940's also, Gina. Not just at home, but on the school bus and at school. Somewhere between the strap and the lack of disipline today is the correct answer.
Thank you for sharing.
Best wishes.
Frederick

frederick Mar 2, 2010 17:29

Hi Gina, My parents were much like yours. They never half killed you, they just demanded respect. I was only spanked once by my dad and I really deserved it. He wept as he spanked me. I never needed another spanking. Thank you for sharing this with us.

Laraine May 27, 2010 07:49

Of course beating your kids won't harm them. A beating however should never be applied in anger. a beating should never be applied for a minor trangression, but some transgressions need real consequences and a tanned hide gives pause for thought.

Over application of beatings however will fail, because the hide becomes conditioned. I know I was over punished with a belt.

Fortunately my children who have been the recipients of a tanned hide on occassion have not needed it more than once or twice a year

Guy Mclaren Nov 11, 2010 00:13

Your mom is quite like my mom, too. And I think I'm glad that she brought us up in proper discipline. It is difficult and a big challenge to raise kids in this generation. How I wish I could have that "LOOK" that would work on my kids. God bless.

sahm Nov 11, 2010 11:51

All mammals physically discipline their children in order to teach them to survive and grow into adults. We also used to do this, but in recent years the 'childrens' rights' lobby [mostly, I suspect, non parents] have all but made smacking your own child a criminal offence, and many young parents don't know how to cope. We see the results everywhere, from the toddler having a tantrum in the supermarket to the teenager with attitude and no respect for others. Good intel, I wonder if we'll ever get back to the sensible days!

Foolonthehill Nov 21, 2010 05:00

Wow! This Intl was great, I must remember to thank my parents sometimes because they too did a wonderful job in raising me and my siblings as well. Thanks!~ GREAT WORK!

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